They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
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