I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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