Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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