Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
