i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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