i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i think i have two assholes
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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