everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
a search helicopter?!
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
