we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
no you cant smoke seaweed
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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