so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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