Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
it's like heaven, but drunker
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
