is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
