How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Randomize