I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
