So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
