guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
