I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
