"it" just moved
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
And then he peed in my hair
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