I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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