lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize