Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
