kristin has been a bad kristin
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
