Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize