Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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