remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
MIDGETS
????
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
