can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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