3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
