and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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