let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
