do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
