it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
