Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
