Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(802): View more from Vermont

that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight

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(325): View more from Texas

Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"

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(910): View more from North Carolina

he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it

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(303): View more from Colorado

How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?

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(605): View more from South Dakota

We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often

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(613): View more from Ontario

Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.

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(727): View more from Florida

I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other

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