i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Randomize
