Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
We talked him into tasing himself.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
