tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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