Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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