I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Randomize
