we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Randomize
