Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
