You really coming over, don't trick.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
