I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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