I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
