I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
