walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
