Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
