We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
