Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
