I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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