Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
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