ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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